Pandora's Box

Idealisation is a dangerous thing. They say that we should never meet our hero’s as it may not be what you had hoped for so how do you come to terms with the fact that an idea you’ve had in your head for so long, a feeling has been a mere fabrication. 

 You played out the scenarios in your head many times, each with a very different ending. Sometimes you lived happily ever after, in others you never got to quite say your goodbye, there was some where you were happy, growing old and grey and others lived a completely different life without you in it. None of these scenarios could ever compare to the feeling you had when you first made the plunge to test the water, dive in and deeply. What were you expecting? Did you have an answer to the years of wondering about the ‘what if’s’? No.

You’ve made the life you want to live plain, simple and easy. Back to basics, you’ve worked hard with every fibre of your being to ensure you can deal with those alone moments. The unkind moments, the awkwardness, the distrusting moments, you’ve done it, a little more settled into your heart is the way things seem. You no longer have any doubts in your mind about the path you want to take and you will happily go the challenge alone. 

Sometimes you wonder had things really moved too fast, became a little too familiar. You’ve lived without it for so long you forget how to handle it when it comes back to you. A gift from me to you, wrapped, then unwrapped, a little bit like Pandora’s box. Yet you want to be there, you want to see how it feels, you want to experience it, live in it and grow from it. Although you need to tread carefully, it isn’t all bad but you must also be prepared to take the lessons that go with it. 

Momentarily, things really are quite precious, pause and take a moment to appreciate those seconds of peace on long drives to places where no one knows your name or those dreams that felt so real that when you wake up you really with all your heart believed it had happened. Although as quickly as you experience these feelings they can just as suddenly disappear with the good comes the bad in life. That’s the worry… these things may have met your needs in a previous life time but what about now? Are they fulfilling the life you want to lead and this isn’t just about a perfect life, no one is perfect and things can change, this is about taking a leap of faith and hoping things are better this time round.

 I find myself from time to time romanticising the past, dwelling on what I could have said or done better, an old soul with a gentle mind and my heart runs off a little, off the beat and track. Although things are looking a little different, you’re happy and the future is looking brighter, just keep on track, don’t dwell on the past, what’s meant for you won’t go by you so close the box.